Country of origin- USA
Year of release- 1965
Director- Robert Gaffney
Stars- Marilyn Hanold, James Karen, Lou Cutell
So, Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster, or as it should more
accurately be called, stock footage: the movie. After a rather peculiar opening
credit sequence, we see an alien space craft hovering outside the earth’s
atmosphere. In the control room of the ship we meet are villains, Princess
Marcuzan and the pasty faced pointy eared Doctor Nadir. It seems they have been
monitoring earth for some time, and are getting ready to enact some kind of
sinister plan. Suddenly a blip on the alien radar makes them think that we
humans have fired a missile at them, when in fact it is a NASA rocket. The
Princess and Doctor Nadir decide to blow it out of the sky, and then do so,
using stock footage of course.
The film then cuts to the
most overcrowded car I have ever seen. Sitting in the back is; a General, two
NASA scientists and a blank faced astronaut called Frank. This scene looks
ridicules, especially as it looks like the General is sitting in the lap of one
of the scientists, who looks very un-happy about the whole thing. We then get a
real time sequence in which we see them driving into the NASA
headquarters and parking. Why did we need to see this in real time? Well let me
tell. This film is 50 minutes stretched to nearly 80 by extended use of real
time driving put to music, and grainy stock footage that the film will cut to
at random points for apparently no reason. This stretched out run time is
almost painful to watch. When the group eventually get into the NASA
headquarters they go to the world’s smallest press conference. It is in fact so
small that it looks like they are announcing a new kind of Sellotape, instead
of what they are actually announcing which is a manned mission to Mars. I am
pretty sure more than four journalists would turn up for that, but apparently
no. During the press conference Frank has some kind of wired seizure that
leaves a huge creepy smile frozen on his face. We then discover that Frank is
in fact a cyborg, who was created especially for this very dangerous mission.
At least that explains the terrible acting.
We then cut to stock footage
of a NASA rocket getting ready to take off. But we all know how this launch
will go because we watched the Aliens blow it apart 20 minutes ago. So of cause
the rocket is destroyed but Frank manages to bail out just in time, and lands
safely, with the help of some stock footage. But the aliens are not happy about
leaving survivors, so they land and begin to hunt down Frank, who during a
fight with one of the alien soldiers is badly burned and driven into a crazed
rampage due to damage to his cyborg brain. This means he then begins to wander
around killing people for no reason. It is soon after this that we find out
what the aliens evil plan is. They want to kidnap are earth women and bring
them back for ‘breeding’, I can’t take the unoriginality, it’s too much!
We then get a montage of some
of the most hilarious kidnappings I have ever seen, most of the women don’t
even bother to resist, they just have zero shits to give. As the women are
brought back onto the alien ship (which by the way is far too small for all
these people) we are introduced to the ‘Space Monster’ of the title. He is
called Mull , and looks a bit like the inbred nephew
of the creature from The Robot Monster.
From here on in the film spirals around in a haze of stock footage and B-movie tropes that eventually leads to the inevitable battle between Frank and
For all this films MANY
problems I did find myself to be entertained throughout some of the runtime,
although nearly all of this came from unintentionally funny things. But the big
problem for this film is that it doesn’t deliver on what the title promises, in
fact we barely even see ‘the Space Monster’ and Frankenstein as you or I would
know him isn’t in it. Instead Frank assumes the roll of the Frankenstein’s
monster character, and is even referred to in this way at one point in the
film. At the end of the day this film has nothing new to offer, but it has
plenty of unintentional humour and is a decent enough watch if you skip through
the stock footage and long winded driving scenes. This one gets a 4.5/10 from me;
it is perhaps worth a watch.
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