CHILL
Country of origin- U.S.A
Year of release- 2007
Director- Serge Rodnunsky
Cast- Thomas Calabro, Ashley Laurence,
I approached this film with some optimism, hoping it would be fun and something a little different. How wrong can one man be. The plot of this film is extremely convoluted, and at times I struggled to even understand what some of the characters where even supposed to be doing. The film centres around a struggling writer called Sam, and his quest to constantly wear a beany hat, even though its summer! At the start of the film we see him attempting to secure a job at a slightly down at heel deli, that appears to be run by the rudest woman I have ever seen. The rude woman says she will have to check with the actual owner whether or not Sam has got the job. Little does Sam know, the owner of the deli is in fact a totally insane undead doctor, with a Frankenstien's monster like creation at his command. Oh, and did I forgot to mention that this undead doctor of evil, kidnaps people and then steals patches of there skin to replace his own. Well he does. This may sound like its a; low budget, B-quality, enjoyable trash fest. But its not, it is in fact a zero budget, Z-quality, heap of trash, that nobody in their right mind would enjoy.
Once the film establishes the main plot, (if you can call it a plot) it then sets about trying to rape are brain cells with a bucket full of pointless sub plots, that add about as much to the film, as getting a roll of barbed wire inserted into your anus would add to your ability to sit down. The stupid sub plots include; a detective stalking a woman he had a one night stand with, a pimp looking for a missing prostitute, and a mind numbingly dull romance.
This film won the Worldfest International Festival award for best special make up effects. But this award must have been free with a box of corn flakes, because the effects in this film are dreadful. Alongside some poor practical effects, that are in no way worthy of an award, there is one scene containing possibly the worst digital effect I have ever seen. The effect was so jaw droppingly awful, I actually rewound the film just to make sure I hadn't had some kind of mini aneurysm!
Serge Rodnunsky, the director of this pitiful sack of mess, is not new to the world of film making. He is in fact an experienced director, with over 40 films under his directorial belt, so why is this film so damn amateurish? I think the answer to that question is clear, just because you have experience, does not mean you have talent, and crucially that's what this film lacked on every front, talent.
MERMAID IN A MANHOLE
Country of origin- Japan
Year of release- 1988
Director- Hideshi Hino
Cast- Shigeru Saiki, Mari Somei, Masami Hisamoto, Go Riju, Tsuyoshi Toshishige,
Warning, this review contains graphic descriptions for truly disgusting imagery. Oh, and some spoilers.
If you are familiar with the infamous Guinea Pig films, you basically know what to expect from this one, a thin plot and a ton of gore, goo and splatter. Plenty of people will tell you that this isn't the nastiest edition in the Guinea Pig series, but I would argue against that. This film may not achieve the levels of gore seen in Flowers of Flesh and Blood, or the levels of gleeful sadism in Devils Experiment. But this film, in my opinion is the most disgusting entry into the series.
The film opens with some rather miserable shots of random objects floating in a sewer. We then see a still twitching fetus floating in the water, the fact that this film has dead/dying babies in a sewer within the first three minutes, should give you an idea of the tone of the film. We then see a figure walking through the sewers towards the fetus, the film then cuts to an artist painting a picture of the fetus. The artist is clearly struggling with some kind of mental anguish, this is then confirmed as a little later on he exits his apartment and bumps into his neighbours, who behind his back discuss his wife leaving him. We then see him go down a manhole back into the sewers, where he finds a decomposing cat which he thinks is a childhood friend, because who hasn't made that mistake? The artist then hears a splashing sound behind him, he go's to investigate and surprise surprise he finds a mermaid. I bet none of you could see that one coming. The artist begins to talk to the mermaid, and then realises that he has seen her before. It turns out that this sewer was once a river, and the artist used to play there as a child. This is a very interesting scene, because it is clearly commenting on the increasing industrialisation of Japan. The artist then notices an infected wound on the waist of the mermaid, who is clearly unwell.
The artist decides to bring her back to his apartment to treat her wound. WE are then treated to a pretty surreal scene of the mermaid sitting up in a bath tube while the artist paints a portrait of her. We then see that her wound has developed large pustules in and around it, suddenly they seem to rupture. Blood gushes everywhere while the mermaid screams and the artist desperately tries to stop the bleeding. Eventually the bleeding stops, and the mermaid passes out. Soon after this we see that the pustules have become much worse, they have spread up her chest almost to her neck. She begs the artist the to cut them open, which he then does with truly revolting results. As the artist slices open one of the pustules, the mermaid screams and leans out over the edge of the bath to allow her pustule to drain into jar that has been placed there by the artist. This process is repeated again and again, we also see long worms, and maggots slithering out of the open pustules and even more disgustingly being pulled out by the artist. I have an extremely strong stomach, but this scene was enough to make me loose my appetite. We then see the artist painting another portrait of the now half dead mermaid, but this time instead of using paint he is using the fluid from the mermaids pustules, waste not want not. We can now see that the rancid pustules have spread to half of her face, but the artist continues to paint her. Suddenly the mermaid leans over the side of the bath and vomits maggot filled blood, then her left eye pops out of her head while puss and blood spurt hose like from her body. She than dies. The artist, in an extreme state of shock, picks up a clever and dismembers the mermaids corpse, and eventually pulls from her stomach, a dead fetus. The film then continues on to reveal a pretty predictable twist ending, but I am not going to give that away.
I came away from the film felling a little depressed, but that didn't in any way
stop me from thoroughly enjoying it. The best aspect of the film was definitely the effects, they where practical and unpleasant. Despite what you may be thinking, this film did have an actual message that it was trying to put across. The film was a lament for a pre over-industrialised Japan, and a protest against the ever increasing putrefaction of natural beauty by humans. I am going to give this film 8/10, I really enjoyed it, and some of the effects where nasty enough to shock me a little bit, and that never happens.
THE ACT OF SEEING WITH ONE'S OWN EYES
Country of origin- U.S.A
Year of release- 1971
Director- Stan Brakhage
The Act Of Seeing With One's Own Eyes is a 32 minute long silent experimental documentary film, that was filmed in a Pittsburgh morgue and shows real autopsies performed on actual human cadavers. Some of you might be thinking this is just another cheap nasty shockumentarie or a mondo film, well it's not, it is in fact an intelligent art film that is attempting to examine the subject of human mortality, and in my opinion it succeeds. The first thing you notice about the film is its complete lack of music and sound, which gives the film a surreal and at times almost ethereal feel. The complete lack of any kind of audio really allows you to focus on what is happening on screen. At first we see the pathologists simply examining bodies, and taking measurements of the joints. Once these examinations have been made the autopsies begin. This is by no means the first footage of autopsies I have seen, but this is the first I have seen without any kind of narration or music, which gives you a real sense of claustrophobia while watching it. As you watch the human body being deconstructed like some sort of complex machine, you develop a sense of just how short life really is. Up until very recently these where; walking, talking, breathing, thinking people, and now they are just meat and are being treated as such.
I came away from the film with a positive feeling, I know that sounds strange but I really did. The film shows you that death is inevitable, and that we should be aware of just how fragile are body's are, because in the end, we are just meat. I know that doesn't sound like the kind of thing to be positive about but I was, the film gave me a sense of we should enjoy the life we have, while we can, because it could all end tomorrow. I am going to give this film 8/10, it really achieved what it set out to do. I don't recommend this film for people who are disgusted by the site of real human gore, but if you can cope with the site of real human death and are interested in the subject of mortality, then I encourage you to watch this film.
